I treasure the days when God was guiding me, preparing a good life for me, changing me into a happy princess of our Heavenly Father.

Before I got married, I had received a basic education in my country and made an average wage working for the post office. I didn’t have high intelligence, and beauty was a million miles away from me. The only requirement I had for a husband was that he must be a “real Christian.” At the time, people didn’t understand me, since in China, from the 1990s, most members of society looked down on people who believed in Jesus. Their view was that Christianity was for old and sick people. I was far from that, and so were many of my believing friends who went to church in my small city.

From Fear to Prayer

When I was a child, I often didn’t want to live because my parents quarreled and fought every day. I didn’t like my family, and it seemed that being married meant unhappiness, and I didn’t want that for my life. But after listening to a Christian radio program from Hong Kong and becoming a Christian, I realized I had never prayed about marriage, even though I frequently thought about it. Then, when I was 29 years old, while absorbed in prayer, I heard a strong voice in my heart saying: “Marriage was created by God; you should trust Him. It is Satan who has distorted the relationship between husband and wife.” It was then that I realized that the living and true God knew everything about me, even the secret dislike I had toward marriage. In that moment, I knew God cared for me and had spoken to me.

My Faith Looks to God

At that time, I started praying for myself, even though I was afraid God might want me to marry a poor guy, or that I would have to go to some terrible rural area in China. I didn’t expect to marry a millionaire, but maybe a middle-class man? The problem was that there was no Christian brother around my age in my home church or even in my small city of around one million. My age kept creeping up—30, 31, 32, 33—and I had no idea where the right man was. In China, a woman who is not married before she is 30 years old was thought strange in people’s eyes. My pastor and coworkers worried about me. They tried to persuade me to soften my ideas for a husband and that I shouldn’t be so stubborn.

Because I had a good job, they suggested that I might marry a person who wasn’t a Christian and help him to become a Christian. I rejected their idea decidedly. Every time, when society, or even church friends and family showered me with what I considered bad advice, I would slip away to a quiet place and pray. There was much pressure, sadness, doubt, hesitation, and despair. Many times, I would retreat to my bedroom and cry until midnight. But I knew God had said, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers,” and I pledged that I would never act against those words.

So, through prayer, my faith got stronger, and I knew that one day I would marry a Christian man. I asked God why it was so hard to marry a Christian. His answer came clearly: “You are waiting for Me. I am waiting for you as well. You pray for a happy marriage, but you hate marriage in your heart. Even if I give you a husband, will you treasure him? Prepare yourself to be a good wife first—before you get married.”

I prayed, “Lord, heal me by Your hand and love. Remove my fears. You created marriage for our good, and I know, with Your blessing, my husband and I would be very happy.”

The Promise of God

Day after day, year after year, I waited. I bought an apartment which had two bedrooms and one living room and thought to myself: “Now that I have my own space, I could marry a pastor.” I realized that since pastors in China are poor, they don’t have enough income to offer a bride a new house. But I knew that I could support my family’s needs. I could marry a pastor, use the house, and we could both serve God with all our heart. What a wonderful dream! I was surprised by my 180-degree change. I had been afraid that God wanted me to marry a poor guy. Now, I felt that I would like to marry a full-time pastor!

By this time, I had been praying for marriage for four years, and God had guided me, corrected me, and built me up by His hands. Also, He had given me His promise. It sounded just like God’s promise to Abraham, that he would have a son. Even though everything looked impossible, God’s words, I knew, were always true. One day I prayed: “Dear Heavenly Father, I don’t have many requirements, but please prepare a man for me who loves You more than he loves me, and would You please show me which man is the one you have appointed or me.” After praying, I felt the Holy Spirit saying, “Your marriage will be an honorable testimony. If you believe, you will see the glory of God.”

Fulfillment of a Dream

In 1996, a magazine called Youth Times published news that young Americans wanted to make pen pal friendships with Chinese young people. Since I had mastered Chinese and had studied English when I was a student, I thought having a pen pal friend might be a good way to improve my English. So, I wrote a letter to Youth Times, stating that I was eager for them to help me find a pen pal. After several months, I got three or four letters from men saying they wanted to date me. My purpose was to study English, not date. As time went by, I totally forgot about the offer to make a pen pal friend.

Then four years later, totally out of the blue, I got another letter from America. I was surprised since I didn’t know anyone who lived there. The person who wrote to me is now my husband, Ken. In his letter, Ken told me of his faith and about the work that he did. He said, “I am looking for someone who loves Jesus Christ, with whom I could become good friends and look toward marriage. I want a wife with whom I can pray and serve God together.”

It was unbelievable! I could not stop my tears. Ken had no idea how long I had been waiting for this moment. I knew this was the man I would marry. After a long prayer, I decided to reply to his letter. A sister in church helped translate my letter into good English. I told Ken about my experience of faith and my dream to marry a pastor and to attend Bible seminary. I quoted Psalm 37:3–6. “Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun.”

As the letters began to flow, I discovered that Ken was quite different than I had expected. He told me that he had gone to church since he was small and that he was “reborn” when he was teenager. He said that he had a calling from God and wanted to tell God’s good news to the Chinese people. Years earlier, he had been a missionary in Central America. He said that the Psalms 37 verses I had quoted were the key verses that had drawn him to personal trust in Christ years before. Now, reading these same verses from a Christian Chinese girl, he prayed, “God, fulfill my destiny, if this is Your will.”

Once in a letter, Ken encouraged me with the verse from Romans 5:5 (BSB): “Hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” That night, I opened my Bible to Romans chapter five and read to verse five. It was amazing that Ken and I were two people with different backgrounds, cultures, and lifestyles, but we had the same values and marriage views. It was the witness of God’s power and love! “All the paths of the LORD are lovingkindness and truth to those who keep his covenant and His testimonies” (Psalm 25:10, NASB1995).

Before Chinese New Year, in January 1999, an American group called Global Education Foundation Association invited Ken to consult on an activity which had a medical exchange with Wuhan City in China. On that project, Ken was able to make a side trip to my home. We fell in love at first sight. It seemed like we had always known each other. Both of us had been longing for each other for many years and had finally come face to face. Our hearts were filled with happiness and joy.

Three days later, we went to Wuhan City together with the Global Education group as this would be a good opportunity to get to know each other better. Ken loves Chinese people and had been to China four times since China’s reform and open door to the world. He had imported medical equipment for use in poor areas of China and had served the Chinese church. So, he was a pastor! God is faithful, always.

When we came back from Wuhan City, it was Chinese New Year’s Eve. We had a great time celebrating the traditional Chinese festival together. Ken was very kind and humble, especially later, when he saw my father lying in bed with a serious disease. Ken knelt and prayed for him and accompanied me to serve my father in the hospital. Ken’s love and behavior won my mother’s and brother’s hearts.

In May of the spring of 2000, the sun was shining brightly as the Lord led Ken and me down the red carpet at our wedding in China, to become husband and wife. Many people heard the story of our love and came from afar. Even ASSIST founder, Dan Wooding, and his lovely wife, Norma, traveled from America to witness our wedding. Inquisitive people filled the whole church. During the celebration of marriage, while wearing my wedding dress, I shared my testimony. After I finished, my mother stood up, came forward, and publicly accepted Jesus as her Savior. Ken guided her in the sinner’s prayer and confession of faith. God’s name got great glory that day, and all the brothers and sisters in the church were comforted and encouraged. We sang loudly “Sing Halleluiah, Praise the Lord!”

Today, Ken and I have been married for more than 25 years, and we have a happy marriage. God made our dreams come true. The happiness of marriage is not dependent on time but on the noble purpose that God ordained for marriage.

True love deserves waiting for. God’s Word promises that “None who wait for You will be put to shame” (Psalm 25:3, BSB). “Blessed is the man who fears the Lord” (Psalm 112:1, BSB).

Wenwen Zhang is a Chinese American author, pastor, and curriculum designer. She married an American missionary in 2001 and is actively involved in writing ministry and global missions. She is currently pioneering and shepherding a house church among Americans in Florida.