My Path to Surrender
By Yulun Long
INFLUENCED BY FOREIGNERS
I was born in Taiwan, an island that was ceded to Japan in 1895 after China’s defeat in the Sino Japanese War and was later returned to China after World War II. My early education from kindergarten through junior high school was under the influence of Japanese teachers. They taught that Tenno, the Japanese
emperor, was a living God, and his ancestor, the Sun Goddess, was the daughter of the creator gods. For nine years before Japan surrendered to the Allies, I, along with all other school children, bowed three times every morning facing northeast, the direction of Tokyo, where Tenno was said to live. I worshipped quite often in Shinto shrines which the Japanese built across our island. At home, I prayed to the Shinto altar which our Japanese teachers instructed us to set up.
After World War II ended and Japan surrendered, the Taiwanese people no longer practiced Shintoism, because ethnically and culturally, we are Chinese. For us, the shameful capitulation of the Sacred Empire under the Sun-goddess proved the Japanese religion to be merely a myth. The collapse of the Shinto myth was one of the significant events in my boyhood.
QUESTIONING THE SPIRIT LIFE
The Taiwanese community, like other groups of Chinese people, was influenced by Buddhism, Taoism, and ancestor worship. When I was a child, adults in my family would take us children to the temples of various gods and goddesses to burn incense sticks and present offerings on the altars. Family worship ceremonies were also frequent. For me, a young boy who was brain-washed by Japanese teachers, this kind of belief was superstitious. However, I did think that perhaps the spirits of the deceased might still exist, even though I did not understand how.
Throughout my childhood, the religious attitude of my grandmother deeply impressed me. She was a kind, benevolent, and pious person who prayed often to Buddha. One day when the war was nearing the end, my grandmother took me to a hut where a homeless woman had died of hunger. She put her hand sewn cloth shoes on the corpse’s feet, burned incense for the dead, and prayed piously. As I observed my grandmother’s good deeds, I learned to respect life and to believe there is a supernatural and spiritual world that the natural mind cannot understand.
When I was 15, my mother died, and I attended her deathbed. Watching a human being hover between life and death was a tearful but solemn moment for me. I could not believe that man, as the lord of all creation, disappeared totally after death. Later, as an engineering student in college, I questioned the limits of science and technology. I believed that there must be something very important outside or beyond this materialistic world. I also thought that there might be an invisible, awesome force which controls the universe, a force so wonderful and so orderly that it could be called Creator or God. I wondered, but I was not sure.
GETTING TO KNOW CHRISTIANS
My first encounter with Christianity came early in my life as well. When I was a boy, I was taken for medical treatment to the Christian hospital of Changhua. On the walls of the hospital was an impressive picture of Leonardo Da Vinci’s Last Supper, and I was told the man in the center of the picture was Jesus Christ. To me, the men in the picture looked strange and foreign, as did the missionary doctor I met. He was a fair-skinned, blue-eyed, grey-haired physician with a big nose who spoke fluent Taiwanese. I later learned that this kind and gentle man was Dr. David Landsborough, a British missionary who worked in my home town for nearly half a century.
During World War II, all Western missionaries had to leave Taiwan because the Japanese said Christianity My Path to Surrender was “the religion of the enemies.” Years after the war, when I was in college, I was invited by some Christian students to attend a Bible study. This was the first time I had read the Bible, and it seemed very antiquated. I could not accept the unreasonable stories of miracles. I disputed, argued, and even ridiculed the Christian students. But they showed great patience with me. They were kind and respectful, like my grandmother.
As a young adult, I enjoyed reading books and seeing good movies, and I was especially attracted to books written by Japanese Christian scholars who were persecuted before and during the war. In some American films of the 1950’s—Quo Vadis, The Titanic, and an Alfred Hitchcock movie I Confess—I saw Christians who possessed unusual moral courage. Though I did not believe in God, these examples influenced my thinking. I felt that in the Christian faith there was an enormous power hiding which was worth seeking.
A SURRENDER
One day I accepted an invitation by a friend to attend a special meeting at a church. It was an evangelistic gathering for unbelievers and was my first experience at a church. The speaker talked about God as the Creator of the universe and of human beings. He said God hates evil, cares for and guides people, and loves men enough to give up His own life for them. He explained that God is not far away in cosmic space somewhere, with no concern for man. The speaker emphasized that to know God, one has first to recognize himself as limited and then surrender to God.
In that moment I began to understand that I am limited, that my reason is not absolute. My arrogance had caused me to deny God because I could not accept what seemed “unreasonable” in the Bible. The speaker urged each of us to accept God and surrender to Him. So with a prayer, I surrendered my mind, body, and soul to God. As the speaker prayed for me, I felt a great joy spring in my heart. I felt I now belonged to God, the Creator and the Lord of the universe.It was an awesome moment.
After my decision, I began to read the Bible avidly. I found it to be a stimulating book. I came to understand more clearly how I, a filthy, ugly soul could be accepted by God. Through Christ, God the Father had revealed Himself to humankind. He showed us what God is like and what His purposes for man are. With the help of Halley’s Bible Handbook, I was able to understand the background and meanings of writings in the Bible. This book, which previously had been just an antiquated book, was now a contemporary book for me.
A FRESH, ABUNDANT LIFE
Immediately I began to experience a church life which was fresh and exciting. I was cared for, cherished, and loved by other Christians. Just two months after I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord, I began teaching children in Sunday school. This was challenging for a new Christian, and I spent much time preparing and praying. But what I experienced was a great joy and blessing. As I served God by serving His little ones, I got to know God better.
Over the past 40 years, I have experienced God’s abundant grace. He has lovingly guided me on the road of my life, and it has been better than anything I could have planned myself. I really understand what King David wrote in his Psalm: "Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."
(Native of Taiwan, Yulin Long became a Christian at an early age. He studied in W. Germany, retired as a chemical engineer, and has been living in Texas since 1988. His wife and and four daughters are all Christians.)